I’ve got pictures to share, I’ll start with the serious ones.
I (for a bit) took part in POP or put on purple (for lupus) today.

Jumping in an effort to show my sarong off

Showing my purple sarong off.

Now for the goofy pictures.

Cleavage Creature

Bosom Buddies.


So I’m getting ready for my 5th in about as many months….

The ones that seem to work either don’t make it through the hormones on my period, or I get too much serotonin and end up having all sorts of issues with acting out my dreams physically.

And the risperdal works for my mania, but not my depression. I can up the dose a bit more and still sort of function, and maybe it’ll help my depression, but I’m too tiny for much more in my system.

We’ll see what comes next…. I’m going in this week to start the paperwork for abilify since that’s why my doc had mentioned as the next possibility…. hopefully I can get it free or really cheap or I can’t even try it. :/

Bipolar is part of our lives intimately and officially.

I say intimately because I have other family members who are bipolar (have bipolar? how do you even word that?) so it’s already been part of our lives, but it’s now a much bigger and deeper part.

I saw my psych doctor yesterday, they got me in on an emergency visit with a cancellation because I’ve had more issues with the Seroquel, and have been having nightmares and such, so something needed to change. This was the first time I’d seen her since my manic episode the other month (well, depressed/suicidal, manic, depressed, back and forth) as I’ve been seeing her nurse the last few months. My Psych agreed with me that it is in fact bipolar, and not just other meds mixed with grief and PPD. Definite, clear manic and depressive cycles. Even on meds, though they aren’t as severe, they still happen.

We took my dose of Celexa down as antidepressants can cause mania to be more severe, and cut my seroquel dose in half. If I haven’t improved by Monday next week we’ll be changing my mood stabilizer. Hopefully one or the other will work, and I won’t have to try to find a way to change my meds again while we’re out of state with the kids.