October 2011

So I’m getting ready for my 5th in about as many months….

The ones that seem to work either don’t make it through the hormones on my period, or I get too much serotonin and end up having all sorts of issues with acting out my dreams physically.

And the risperdal works for my mania, but not my depression. I can up the dose a bit more and still sort of function, and maybe it’ll help my depression, but I’m too tiny for much more in my system.

We’ll see what comes next…. I’m going in this week to start the paperwork for abilify since that’s why my doc had mentioned as the next possibility…. hopefully I can get it free or really cheap or I can’t even try it. :/

I didn’t expect Halloween to hit me as hard as it has this year….

Yes I was excited to dress Lily up in her first costume and take her trick or treating (health allowing for both of us of course), but….. I didn’t think it was as big a deal as my grief is making it. 😦

This is just ripping my heart out all over again.

October is Infant/Pregnancy Loss Awareness Month..Please take a moment to think of all the little ones lost too soon..It is a pain that never goes away..Noone should ever lose their child! If you know someone who has lost a child/miscarriage, just let them know you are thinking of them..That’s all we need to hear sometimes..You have no idea how much a simple “thinking of you” means ♥ Lilith Faith (12/23/10-1/5/11) and 4 miscarriages.