Bipolar is part of our lives intimately and officially.

I say intimately because I have other family members who are bipolar (have bipolar? how do you even word that?) so it’s already been part of our lives, but it’s now a much bigger and deeper part.

I saw my psych doctor yesterday, they got me in on an emergency visit with a cancellation because I’ve had more issues with the Seroquel, and have been having nightmares and such, so something needed to change. This was the first time I’d seen her since my manic episode the other month (well, depressed/suicidal, manic, depressed, back and forth) as I’ve been seeing her nurse the last few months. My Psych agreed with me that it is in fact bipolar, and not just other meds mixed with grief and PPD. Definite, clear manic and depressive cycles. Even on meds, though they aren’t as severe, they still happen.

We took my dose of Celexa down as antidepressants can cause mania to be more severe, and cut my seroquel dose in half. If I haven’t improved by Monday next week we’ll be changing my mood stabilizer. Hopefully one or the other will work, and I won’t have to try to find a way to change my meds again while we’re out of state with the kids.